How to tell your dad your dating someone
New merch: At what point do you tell your parents you have a SO? October 3, We have radically different approaches to how much we tell our respective parents for what it's work, we're both in our late twenties. I talk to my parents a few times a week and let them know a few weeks in that I was dating someone.
How to Tell a Strict Father That I Have a Boyfriend
New merch: At what point do you tell your parents you have a SO? October 3, We have radically different approaches to how much we tell our respective parents for what it's work, we're both in our late twenties. I talk to my parents a few times a week and let them know a few weeks in that I was dating someone. He hasn't let them know he's dating someone yet. At what point do folks generally start telling parents they're seeing someone? I guess I want to know what the norms are, and what makes you feel ready or hesitant to share your dating life with your parents.
For what it's worth, neither of us have met the other's folks, and we're pretty committed and spend a lot of time almost every evening together, but are not talking about the future at this moment since we're both going through some major life changes. I feel a little insecure that he hasn't told them about me yet, but if not telling parents about a significant other is pretty normal this early on, I'll feel less awful about it.
We both have solid relationships with our parents, though he doesn't talk to his folks nearly as often as I talk to mine. It depends on the individual's relationship with their parents. I personally almost never told my mother about anyone I was dating and would not let her meet any of them, because it wasn't important to me or worth the hassle of dealing with her in any way.
I was pretty clear about explaining this "it's not you, it's her, trust me! I'm pretty sure this has absolutely nothing to do with you, and speaks more to your boyfriend's relationship with his parents. Maybe he was raised in a family where his parents never asked him about dating. Maybe his parents want to hear how he is doing at work or school. There is no "generally" here. Everyone is really quite different, and everyone has vastly different relationships with their parents.
I almost never talk to my parents about my relationships, but that's about me and my parents, not about me and my relationships. My partner doesn't share a lot about his life with his parents. It took a long, long time for him to tell them he was in a serious relationship. Different folks are different in this respect. Mine knew about two weeks in. I told my parents the day after my first date with my now-husband, and they met him a month later.
My sister was dating her partner for over a year before she told anyone parents included about him. It all depends upon the relationship with the parents. For me, I am extremely open with my parents in regards to the goings on in my life. My sister says I have "tell-daddy-everything-itis" and thinks I am insane. She hates feeling like they are meddling in her life so she keeps everything very close to the chest.
Telling our parents represented to her a major pain in the ass because she knew correctly that my dad would get all worked up and start harping on with relationship advice and having all sorts of questions about him, etc. Her partner knew this, took no offense, and let my sister tell when she was comfortable. He knew it had nothing to do with him. She wasn't ashamed of him or anything, she just doesn't like parental involvement in her life.
FWIW they are still together 3 years later and just bought a house together, so it really wasn't anything against him posted by PuppetMcSockerson at I'd be about on your boyfriend's timeframe, but I am a little more withdrawn about this sort of thing. I'd tell my family before I was planning on bringing my SO to meet them, but not too much before. This is only one sign of many potential. What are his other relationships like? Do his friends know about you?
Have you met them? There is no norm. My third date with my now wife involved picking up a Christmas tree for my mom, taking it to her house and decorating it for her. Of course it was at that point that my mom realized I had an SO. I think it was several months before I told my dad and I was living with him at the time. It depends on: Your relationship, his relationship with his parents, his past relationships because maybe he had a bad experience with his parents meeting an SO , the phase of the moon, etc.
This varies wildly from person to person. I found that unusual, but it was fine. I generally don't tell my parents until there's a natural time to tell them, like if I mention I'm going to some event, and they ask if I'm going with anyone, and I'm like yeah, [name], and they're all "who's [name]? Long story short, people have all sorts of relationships with their families, and these discussions can be strained and come fraught with all sorts of baggage.
I wouldn't worry about it too much. I think it would be totally fine if you asked your boyfriend why, though. You're allowed to be curious. I guess I want to know what the norms are There's no such animal. But whatever the very wide range of "normal" is, five months is definitely well within it. It can also depend on the culture. I've known Indian women who had boyfriends for years and never told the parents.
I've also had someone after 4 months tell me he hadn't yet told his family about me, and that if he "told them about every little relationship" I'd just ask my SO. Peepsburg at I wouldn't tell my parents father and stepmother that I was dating someone until we were engaged, living together, or had been exclusive for at least a year. I wouldn't say anything until I was ready for a partner to be treated as a member of my immediate family, because that's how they would treat any partner I mentioned, even casually, because they really, really, in a loving but very uncomfortable way, want me to be married as soon as possible.
I'm much closer to my sisters, but even them I wouldn't tell until I was ready to be treated a long-term social unit with someone, because it wouldn't be fair to tell them and ask them to keep it a secret from my father. My family are very nice, but they want to invite people I've known for a few days home for Christmas to ask about their intentions towards me, because they worry that if I spend one more holiday without a ring on my finger, I'm going to be alone forever, and since they're so happily married, that would be a tragedy.
So, I choose not to share. Nor does it, really, have to do with not loving my family; they're just terrible on this particular issue, and I choose to save myself and my dates that discomfort. That's me. Your SO may have his own reasons that also have nothing to do with you. The best way to find out is to talk about it. I told my mother I was dating my husband when I decided to move in with him. Not everyone is as close to their parents as you are.
I've been with my wife for over a decade and I still haven't met her parents she really, really doesn't like her parents. My mom only met her well after we'd gotten married and only knew she existed because I happened to mention she'd been in a car accident and my mom was all "Who's that?! Part of the reason I didn't tell my mom anything is she'd always get really weird about girls I was seeing or she thought I was seeing and I wanted to have the foundations of the relationship in place before she got all weird.
Even within the bounds of "he has a good, solid relationship with his parents" there are so many reasons why he might intentionally or unintentionally delay telling them about an SO. I do not think you are even close to the timeframe where I would start asking questions about it. Maybe at one year, or at a major relationship threshold cohabitation, engagement, house buying, etc. Family telling is a very individual personal thing.
Friend telling I think should happen fairly early on. If it is five months in and he hasn't introduced you to any of his friends, that is when you should worry. I never told my mom I was dating anyone until it was time for whoever I was dating to physically meet her, not because I didn't want her to know, but because there was always a chance she would tell my grandmother. My grandmother would then get on the phone with every single human being she knew and straight-up make shit up about how I'm getting married to a person she never met and that I am terrible.
I never told anyone about that because I didn't want people to think certain members of my family were, well, exactly who they were. His relationship with his parents might be fine, but there are all sorts of other people who may not use this information for good. As people have said, there is no norm but you should speak about it if it makes you feel insecure.
I met my SO's parents at Thanksgiving, which was about 3 months in, and my parents didn't know of his existence until nearly 10 months. I told him early on that this is how I am on this issue and he was okay with it until he wasn't okay with it, which was at the 10 month point. He basically said, when do I met your parents, I'd like to.
I realized it was important to him then, put aside my quirk about it, and set up a dinner with us all. I have a friend who has dated both men and women. Her parents were upset they found out she was dating a woman, and told her they didn't want to hear about it. When she was later dating a man she was very reluctant to tell her parents and didn't do so for a long time. So yeah, it depends. Oh, and I'll say, I talk with members of my family several times a week. When asked and I'm asked often , I actively lie.
It's for my dates' benefit as much as for mine, because if I didn't lie, all of my dates would end up on the mailing list for my stepmother's New Years Letter, which is all about the details of the medical procedures she's had in the past year. Though recently, I told my sister that she needs to stop asking, and that I'll tell her when there's something to tell, and she's respected that for over a month, so she may be reforming somewhat Hell, I told my mom about the lady I was seeing right after we got married.
Whatever way, telling your parents that you have a boyfriend can be intimidating, Ask someone you trust to help, not someone who may reveal your news Do you think that your parents will be mad because you're dating?. Well obviously, if you tell your parents that you're dating someone, they're going to have a load of questions for you. Be sure to prepare yourself.
All Wellness Self Help. All Self Help. Astro World.
Dating under your dad's strict eye doesn't seem easy. That said, you fell for a guy and now you have a boyfriend.
It's not always easy to talk to your parents about your love life, and depending on the type of relationship that you have with them in general and their thoughts and opinions about dating, telling your parents about your bf can seem like a difficult, uncomfortable and awkward task. Fortunately, there are ways that you can make this conversation run far more smoothly and end far more successfully. Timing is everything when it comes to telling your parents that you have a boyfriend.
#KeepCalm: How To Tell Your Parents You're Seeing Someone
With these simple tips and tricks, you can get the weight off your chest in no time. Therefore, it helps if you have one parent on your side while you tell the other. Your parents may be busy with work and may often come home feeling drained on weekdays. Or maybe you have a chaotic household with small children running around. If you want to tell your parents about your boyfriend, you should choose a time when they are calm and in a relaxed, good mood. You should also think about the right place to tell your parents.
10 Things Your Parents Should (and Shouldn't) Know About Your Dating Life
Show less Ask a Question Related Articles References. Once socially frowned upon in some cultures, more and more people accept interracial dating and marriage as a non-issue these days. One factor that still inhibits interracial relationships is a fear that family will react negatively and reject the relationship. If you are worried about your family's reaction to the news that you are dating someone outside your race, you may want to initiate a conversation to let them know and to reassure them about any concerns they may have. The type of conversation you have may differ depending on whether you live at home or if you are an independent adult. Family Friends and Dating. Learn more.
Subscribe To Our Newsletter!
For some of us, it's really important that our parents approve of our partner. If you're close to your family or just have a lot of respect for them, it can feel like a must that they like your partner. I love the fact that my mom and girlfriend get along, and it was a total nightmare when my parents and step parents quite rightly didn't approve of some of my earlier choices. Some parents, like my parents, may make their dislike obvious.
How to Tell Your Kids You’re Dating Someone New
You're dating someone new, and everything is going ah-mazing. All your friends are well aware of your budding romance, and you've even posted a photo of you two together on Instagram. The logical next step seems to be to let your family know about bae. But how long should you date before telling your parents you're in a relationship? When it comes to telling your folks that things are getting serious, you might be wondering what the rules are. Are there any rules? To help sort this out, I talked to some dating experts. But how should you decide how long is best for you? Marcus explains that "everyone has different relationships with their families, depending on how they were raised and the degree of self-disclosure that takes place in the parent-child relationship. Alexandra Solomon , clinical assistant professor and staff therapist at Northwestern University and author of Loving Bravely: So, to figure out exactly when the best time to tell your mom and pops about your SO will depend on your specific family dynamics.
How to Tell Your Parents You Have a Boyfriend
Lots of teens start dating without their parents knowing. This is understandable as many teens simply find it hard to talk to their parents about something like this. This article with give you a nice insight on how to approach your parents about a relationship. To create this article, 21 people, some anonymous, worked to edit and improve it over time. This article has also been viewed , times. Learn more. April 23,
What To Do If Your Parents Don't Like Your Partner, According To Experts
It was supposed to be their dad. You were supposed to stay with him forever — but that went south. If you can assure them that their other parent is already aware of this news, the guilt and burden they may feel will be lifted. When you do decide the time is right, pull each child aside individually to deliver this news. A close, intimate conversation between just the two of you will afford him or her a greater sense of safety and more freedom to react in a genuine, uninhibited way. Any and all questions are fair game. You can use digression in how you answer the questions — but allow them to ask, nonetheless.
How Long Should You Date Before Telling Your Parents? Experts Explains
For all intents and purposes, when it came to me, my parents were extremely lax. This is probably because unlike my brother and sister, I always remembered to call and check in, in high school my social life consisted of debate tournaments and practically nothing else, and beyond that I was always capable of talking myself out of anything remotely fun if I thought it might upset someone. So even when I went through that crazy period of staying out until 3am and sleeping past noon, they never really questioned what I was doing or who I was with, trusting instead that I'd abide by their limited rules no being brought home by the police, no needing to have an ambulance or the fire department called, and no getting involved in internet porn. With all of that said I knew instinctively that there were some things that they should have known about my dating life, even after especially after I got old enough to be considered an adult. And of course there were some things that were and are none of their business at all.
So you ' ve finally done it—you ' ve landed yourself a full-on relationship with a capital " R. Well, not necessarily. You still have the nerve-wracking task of breaking the news to your parents. And depending on where mom and dad fall on the " protectiveness " scale, it could go really well… or your relationship could be over before it even gets a chance to start. Either way, telling your parents about your new relationship should always be handled with care.
A subreddit dedicated to asking women questions about their thoughts, lives, and experiences; providing a place where all women can comfortably and candidly share their responses in a non-judgmental space. As part of our commitment to that mission, the AskWomen subreddit is curated to promote respectful and on-topic discussions, and not serve as a debate subreddit. The quick and dirty version click the graphic for the full set: Use the search tool and FAQ before you post. No pot-stirring.How To Tell Your Parents You Want To Date